The Sexual Urge

Vinyl Lust: A 23-year-old man was arrested in February and charged with a series of break-ins at sex shops in downtown Cairns, Australia, in which the intruder inflated plastic dolls, had sex with them and left messes. (In the break-ins at Laneway Adult Shop, the perp appeared to be sweet on "Jungle Jane.") [Cairns Post, 1-7-09]

George Bartusek Jr., 51, was arrested in February in Cape Coral, Fla., in his car in the parking lot of a Publix supermarket. He had parked next to the front door, apparently to obtain the optimal audience, and was having sex with two blow-up dolls in the front seat. He told police he had come to the shopping center to buy clothes for his gals. [Fort Myers News-Press, 2-5-09]

Even Zombies got to get it once in awhile

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Not the brightest bulb

A young woman's hoax call about an armed robbery designed to distract police so she could drive home after drinking backfired on her.

A young couple who had been out drinking around 1am this morning thought they could outsmart police with a hoax call after they were told not to drive home, North Shore area commander inspector Les Paterson says.

After telling police they would walk to a nearby taxi stand, they instead they called 111 and reported a bogus incident of masked men with guns on the forecourt of a service station about 500 metres away.

"They had the brief pleasure of watching a bunch of police cars whiz past, they then jumped in their car intending to drive off in the opposite direction but a police officer took a detour on a 'hunch' and located them."

The pair denied making the call so the police communications centre redialled the number that had rung 111 and to the young woman's embarrassment the phone she was holding started ringing.

She then admitted her actions, Mr Paterson says.

A 22 year old east Auckland woman was arrested for making a false complaint and attempting to drive with excess breath alcohol and will appear in the North Shore District Court next week

Too much alcohol and brain eating and this what a Zombie does.

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More Drinking Zombies

A Des Moines man had a rude awakening Friday morning.

 

Tony Punelli found a naked and unresponsive man in his hot tub at Southeast Thornton just after 7 a.m. Police were called and extricated Ryan Hutton, 24, of Indianola, from the hot tub. 

 

"Pretty hard way to wake up - some stranger in your hot tub," said Punelli.

 

Police said Hutton was intoxicated but OK. They said Hutton had climbed a 6-foot fence to get into Punelli's back yard and hot tub.

 

"I don't know how he got in here. It's pretty hard to get over that fence without a ladder," said Punelli.

 

Hutton told police he had been drinking in West Des Moines and had no idea how he got into the hot tub, but thought he was in a known location.  

 

"Asked if he knew where he was at and he believed he was in the right place, but obviously it wasn't his house," said Officer Greg Dickel.

 

"I thought I was dreaming, but I'm happy the man didn't drown", said Punelli.

 

Hutton was arrested and charged with criminal trespassing.
Again, Alcohol and Zombies don't get along. After a hard night of zombing? Anything goes though!

From KCCI in Des Moines Iowa 

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Mysterious Bulldozer?

Police are trying to figure out how a full-sized bulldozer ended up stuck in Big Otter Creek in Elgin County this weekend.

Enforcement officers for Ontario's Natural Resources Ministry were patrolling the creek for illegal fishing when they came upon something much bigger.

The dozer was leaking fuel, so officers called in the Environment Ministry and Ontario Provincial Police.

On the way to the scene at the end of Jackson Line in Bayham, police came across the owner of the bulldozer, who isn't permitted to drive a motor vehicle, but was driving an ATV in a manner that drew their suspicion.

That is what happens when Zombies fool around, they are not good at practical jokes.

From the London Free Press

Police asked the man to take a breathalyser test, but he refused and was arrested.

OPP Const. Michelle Smith has covered her fair share of impaired driving investigations, but none that involved a bulldozer.

"It's the first time," she said yesterday.

Michael Heinz Hesch, 56, of Bayham, is charged with impaired driving, driving while disqualified and failing to provide a breath sample.

Police haven't laid charges over the bulldozer that ended up in the creek, said Smith, because they' would need to know who operated it.

The bulldozer has been removed from the creek and the Environment Ministry, with help from the Bayham fire department, remained at the scene to clean up the fuel leak.

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An honest mistake!

KISSIMMEE , Fla. (UPI) -- Authorities in Florida said a woman dialed 911 to report that she had locked herself in her car and the electrical system wasn't working.

The Kissimmee, Fla., woman told the dispatcher that the locks wouldn't work due to the electrical trouble but apologized after she was instructed to lift the manual lock with her hand, WESH-TV, Orlando, Fla., reported Wednesday.

"Um, I'm sorry," the embarrassed woman said after unlocking the door.

Officials stressed that the incident was a serious call and not an early April Fools' Day joke.

Now that is a true Zombie for ya! Electrical devices scare them sometime

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Inquiring minds

SAGINAW, Mich. (UPI) -- A man in Saginaw, Mich., says he spent nearly 4 hours at a gas station after getting one of his fingers trapped in his sport utility vehicle's gas tank.

Victor Harris said he was attempting to remove a piece of paper from his Lincoln Navigator's gas tank Friday, when he found he was unable to extract his finger from his vehicle, WJRT-TV of Flint, Mich., reported.

"A piece of paper was around the little hole, so I just tried to put my little finger in there, rub it off," Harris said. "My finger just slipped in there. It was like, 'Dang, it won't come out.'"

He tried unsuccessfully for nearly 2 hours to remove his finger, before fire crews and emergency personnel were called to the scene.

The emergency workers ultimately cut the vehicle's gas tank out to allow Harris to be taken to a nearby hospital with his finger still trapped.

Finally, after 4 1/2 hours, Harris' finger was freed and the Saginaw resident had a lesson to share.

"Don't stick my finger back in the gas tank," Harris told WJRT-TV. "Shoot."
That is what i like about Zombies, always learning.

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But the were the Doughnuts fresh

SAINT JOHN, N.B. — Workers at a Tim Hortons in New Brunswick had to do a double-double take after a drive-thru customer placed an order in the nude.

Police officers were called to the coffee shop in Saint John’s north end today after reports of a naked driver.

The women working at the drive-thru window were not impressed.

Sometimes when Zombies wake up and need a coffee, they forget to put there pants on! 

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